Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
