Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
