I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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