operation harelip BJ is a go
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
