I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Damn victory sex feels great
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