"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
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