Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
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