She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Randomize
