I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
