that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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