You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.�
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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