talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Randomize
