hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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