Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
