Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
