I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Still dying that you shit outside
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize