I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize
