wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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