yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
