Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Randomize
