You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Randomize
