They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
