fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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