if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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