do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
