There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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