I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Randomize
