i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
