I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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