did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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