I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Come on in and take your pants off
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