Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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