Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
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