maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
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