I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
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