i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Randomize
