he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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