Cold hands, warm shart.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
