VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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