i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Randomize
