We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
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