why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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