The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Randomize
