yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
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