So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Randomize
