how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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