Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
