what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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