so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
