This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
